The Whirlwind that was leaving Biloxi

  A few days ago, I fed a moving crew donuts and fried chicken and stared at them for ELEVEN HOURS while they packed up my house. A tyrannosaurus Rex might as well have packed it, with his tiny little arms. He probably would have gotten done around the same time. Once they finally left, Kyle and I were under the impression that we would have a pre inspection of the house, where they would tell us what all to clean and turn off, and then stay in the empty house for another week before the final inspection. As per usual, the world turned upside down for a second, and when it flipped back to right-side up, we were completely wrong. The USAF had changed their minds, amended our orders, and we had one night to clean EVERYTHING to inspection standards (without knowing what they were), throw away 3 carfulls of trash and cardboard in some unsuspecting dumpster in town, and then pack the Jeep with all of our remaining stuff for the trip to Arkansas. Kyle also had to out process and get everything sorted out on base so that we could actually leave, which would take all day. Nice. 
 I rented a rug Doctor and borrowed a vacuum and broom from our good friends, the Dentons. I went to the self help store and wrestled 3 other spouses to the death for a weed eater and some white touch-up paint. (Evidently Irish love knot spoons are very pretty, but aren't meant to be displayed on walls, as they are prone to eat them.) All the houses in our neighborhood have giant white plastic privacy fences around the backyard... so with the exception of those with kids, NO ONE mows their back yard. We did until we realized that nobody cared that we did... so we stopped. 
  Imagine weed eating the Amazon Rainforest. This was not that bad, but I'm sure my memory will always make it seem like it was, so I'll just go ahead and throw out that imagery. Once I was finally done, I noticed that the bottom of the privacy fence was green from the weed eater throwing grass at it. I went to sweep it off. Nothing doing. I hadn't realized that our privacy fence was made from 2 parts plastic and 1 part marshmallow. I had tattooed my fence with high velocity grass. Awesome. 
   Kyle came home and helped while I had to go to work. He shampooed the living rug room twice, consolidated, and swept out the garage. He also tried to take a stab at the fence tattoo, to little satisfaction. He ended up going to bed at 11 pm so that he could survive the rest of out processing the next day. I stayed up until around 4:30 AM meticulously cleaning everything I could think of, occasionally coming across giant problems... like the fact that our new red bed sheet had created a pick rectangular shadow on the wall. Mr. Clean and I tackled that thing for a good hour until it became just faint enough to go unnoticed. 
  I put the last of our belongings in the Jeep about a millisecond before the inspector pulled up. His words were. "Hi. You haven't had your pre-inspection? THAT doesn't sound good." However it turned out that Kyle and I are the first couple, without having a pre-inspection to make it off base without having to pay at least $500. In fact, the only thing we got charged for was some weird red tinge on the carpet that Kyle and I had NEVER seen before. Undoubtedly a robber came into the house while we were sleeping, realized there was nothing to steal, and out of sheer annoyance, spilled his Strawberry Fanta on the carpet. The crime in the country is atrocious.  
  He also didnt notice the fence tattoo, which looked considerably better after I scrubbed it with clorox on a kitchen sponge at 3 AM. Thank Goodness.
  When I was a little Air Force Brat, helping my siblings and my Mom prepare our house for inspection, I never thought it would help me in the future. I vividly remember all of us kids lined up scrubbing the walls and thinking, "I am a slave. We are being treated like slaves." I thought about that while scrubbing the tattooed privacy fence and thought...wow...I really wish I had some slaves, right about now. ....Meaning children, who could help.. Not actual slaves. Just wanted to make that good and clear.
 Astoundingly, we were able to get outprocessed, sell Kyle's car, AND eat with and say goodbye to friends before we left for Searcy around 9 PM. It was an impressive day. One we will never forget.

Here is a recent picture I took of a Biloxi sunset near our house. :)